I sat with a beautiful and wise friend one night. It was the full moon and the energies were intense. We talked of lovers falling away, friends dying and the forever changing winds of time. She would continue to say “everything is temporary.”
In my experience; we don’t want it to be temporary. We try to hold on. We try to tie it down! We try to secure our lives into something we can depend on; only to find out the one thing we can truly depend on is that nothing is ever really secure.
We live in an ever changing Universe and one season is always flowing into the next. The more we resist the current of our lives, the more we experience congestion. It is said that our resistance to “what is” is what creates our greatest pain.
Letting go can be one of the most difficult things we do. Our struggle is when we try so hard to hold on.
One night, around Valentines day, I was playing one of my new songs in a café and when I sang the word “surrender” a balloon broke loose and fell into the room and the words on the balloon were “LOVE.”
I didn’t experience it the way a few café sitters did. To them, it was truly an experience of surrendering to love.
What does it mean to surrender to love? It means to surrender to life? Love is the beauty of life unfolding and moving and connecting here and connecting there and having all these truly wild experiences. The challenge is to find the heart of each experience and hold onto that.
Our tendency is to stay rooted in fear. We are so often unconsciously anchored in the fear of loss, the fear of abandonment, the fear of change, the fear of intimacy, the fear of inadequacy, or the fear that we will never truly be loved?
What I have found on my long journey, is that I can never depend on another to love me. I can only depend upon myself. If I don’t honor myself and treat myself with the deepest respect then I will lose my trust in myself. When I can fully trust myself my fears begin to fall away. I no longer fear that I will be abandoned because I no longer abandon myself. I no longer fear change, because I have learned to trust the process of life. I no longer fear intimacy because I am not afraid to be seen for who I am. I no longer fear inadequacy because I have taken the power from others to make me feel inadequate.
Life itself is temporary! Our lives are a gift to be lived. If we can stop fearing death we can begin to live. Death is life and life is death. It is a continuing cycle. I find that I must always surrender to the next cycle which is the same as allowing the creation of the new chapter.
Letting go of the past is the same as letting go of the dead. The past is the dead. Eckhart Tolle says “The Power is Now!” Now is the only place that is alive! Everything else is either passed away or an imagined future.
We must grieve the dead because grieving is how we let go. We let go with our tears.
During my deepest grieving period, my grieving was my “now.” My reality was about being in a state of grief. I tried my best not to judge it or make it wrong. It is what it is; and by allowing myself to be where I was without judgment, I could move through it allowing my tears to nourish the tender seed still lying in the cold, damp earth.
Now that seed is sprouting forth new life. The warmth of my tears awakened the life within the seed. I am experiencing the rebirth of myself!
I know in my life that I will be born again and again and again and I am always dying to the old; and one day I will die to the body and my spirit will be released to experience yet another reality.
(an excerpt from “Rebirth; Traversing the Dark Night of the Soul” by Kaleah…not yet released)